That Technique
by Archica
Summary: [Hidan x Ino] Ino volunteered to keep Hidan busy for the others. What if she had gotten her chance?


That Technique  
A.k.a.: IF THINGS HAD TURNED OUT THE WAY THEY SHOULD HAVE

"I'll keep Hidan busy," Ino had said, and the others didn't have time to protest before she leapt forward and lunged at him, launching an attack. He easily dodged the thrown kunai and her various swift kicks and jabs, but she had successfully drawn him several feet away from his partner. Now she just had to lure him further into the forest.

She flung more kunai at him, creating an unrelenting onslaught of weapons that drove him in the direction she wanted. She was desperate. She couldn't let her friends down.

But it was too easy wasn't it? Hidan almost seemed to be grinning. Was he being driven into the forest or was he the one luring her?

They were deep into the woods now, far from the others. Hidan swung his scythe and Ino bled. It was too late now. She froze, realizing that there was no escape. She was supposed to call for help in this situation, but her friends were busy enough on their own. She couldn't disappoint them. Her only option was to try and keep Hidan occupied until they dealt with Kakuzu and came to help.

"Wait!" Ino cried as Hidan finished drawing the symbol on the ground and prepared to stab himself.

He paused and looked at her. "What?"

_Think of something! Anything! Delay him... you just have to delay him. Fine, I'll have to use that technique..._

She suddenly lifted her hand pulled the band from her hair, releasing it to fall across her shoulders. She gave her best pose, hips jutted out, breasts high, and plastered a sexy pout on her face. "I... I wanted to separate you from all the others for a reason," she said, "I didn't want my team mates to know because they'd call me a traitor but, I find you extremely attractive."

Hidan's eyebrows were raised in an expression of disbelief. For perhaps the first time he seemed to be truly at a loss for words. He stared at her for a moment, then narrowed his eyes. "Wait, wait, wait. Just because Kakuzo said I don't think doesn't mean I'm a moron. I won't be distracted that easily!"

He lifted the scythe and brought it down toward his leg, but Ino again screamed for him to wait. The shrillness of her voice caused him to pause again. "What the fuck?! I told you I won't fall for that kind of..."

He suddenly realized that Ino had stripped to her underwear. "When did you... I mean I just glanced away for a second and... wait. Any girl who can get out of her clothes that fast is a whore. Your plan is shot now. I'm not contaminating myself."

Ino burned with rage at the remark, but quickly composed herself. "No no, I'm not like that! It's just... seeing you standing there so close and all, I couldn't restrain myself. I've actually never been with a man before." She fake blushed and batted her eyes.

"You're full of shit."

"You don't believe me?"

"Not for a fucking second."

Ino grimaced. _What's it gonna take?_ She then stuck her thumbs into the waistband of her panties and pulled them down very slightly. "You can come and examine me if you want. Then you'll have proof, right?"

Hidan's eyes widened. "Well, I guess I could-" He suddenly slapped his forehead then glared at her. "Wait, you're still just fucking distracting me!"

Ino thought for a moment, then said "So what? Even if I am, can't you take your time with me and have a little fun? You said your partner can take care of my team mates. You have me trapped in your jutsu. What do you have to lose?"

Hidan seemed to be mentally debating on what to do. He looked her up and down, then looked back toward the direction they came from. Ino assumed he was trying to figure how long it would be until Kakuzu was finished with Kakashi and the others. "Ah, what the hell, let's do it."

He dropped the scythe and pulled off what remained of his torn cloak. He started to step toward her but suddenly looked down at the symbol beneath his feet. "You come to me," he said.

_Damn. He's not as stupid as I'd hoped._

Ino smiled and closed the distance between them, slowly wrapping her arms around his neck when she reached him. He covered her lips with his own, plunging his tongue into her mouth.

_Ugh, why couldn't he at least look normal when I do this? It's like kissing a skeleton._

She pulled back a little. "Hey, do you think you could change back to normal, just for a little while? You're so much hotter that way."

He frowned, obviously aware of her thinly veiled attempt to get him to cancel the jutsu. She quickly kissed him again and pressed her body against his, hoping to distract him. It seemed to work, as his hands flew to the hooks of her bra, unfastening them with more speed than she expected. She let it slip from her shoulders and drop to the ground. Now she was beginning to feel uncomfortable. This technique had never gotten her this far before.

_Come on, Shikamaru! What's taking you guys so long? Surely the three of you can handle Kakuzu!_

Hidan apparently noticed that she was becoming less bold and more hesitant in her actions. He paused and pulled away. "What? Backing out on your distraction plan?" he asked, grinning.

She hated that smug look. He was so confident that his partner would kill the others, he didn't even care that she was just delaying him. She frowned at him for the first time, no longer seeing the need to pretend she was attracted to him.

"It's your choice. You're gonna end up dead either way, so do whatever you want."

"If you really don't care," she said, taking a step back, "then you won't mind if we take this slow."

"To buy your friends more time? Sure, whatever. They'll be killed in a few minutes if not already. Then hell, Kakuzu can join in if he wants to."

Ino glared at him. "My friends will kill him. Then they'll come for you."

Hidan's grin broadened. "Maybe I should go help him then."

Ino blinked. "Wait, you're dealing with me first, right?" She again stepped closer to him and continued where they had left off.

Their remaining clothes were discarded and Hidan seemed strangely amused by the fact that Ino quite obviously had no idea what she was doing. She was supposed to be seducing him but he ended up taking the lead. "So you were telling the truth earlier," he said.

They were now on the ground, still in that damned symbol. "Earlier?"

He laughed, and she decided it was one of the most unpleasant sounds she'd ever heard. "When you said you'd never been with a man before."

Ino's blush was genuine this time. "Do you enjoy being an asshole?"

"I enjoy a lot of things."

Ino blanched. She really didn't want to know. But as he laid her back on the ground and carefully climbed over top of her, she was really striken by the fact that none of his actions had been the least bit rough or aggressive. _Too bad this guy's a murdering psychopath. He really didn't look that bad in his normal form._

Hiden positioned himself. "Last chance to back out," he said, that horrible grin still on his face.

Ino opened her mouth, preparing to tell him to just get on with it, when what appeared to be a big black blur zipped by, knocking Hidan off her.

She looked up to see Sai standing a few feet away, over Hidan who was making his way to his feet. The jutsu was canceled, and Ino hurried to pull her clothes back on. She was completely red with embarrassment.

"What did you do to her?!" she heard Sai scream as he lunged at Hidan furiously.

Hidan dodged his attacks. "Ask her! It was her fucking idea!"

Ino was pulling her shoes on when Sai paused and looked back at her. She sighed. "It's a technique. You know, distract the enemy? Buy some time?"

The poor boy looked incredibly confused. In the meantime Hidan had somehow gotten hold of his pants and cloak, pulling them back on and cursing as he tried to find his own shoes. "Fucking back up," he muttered, and disappeared into the trees, obviously heading back to where he had left his partner.

Sai held out his hand to Ino. "That's, um, a very impressive technique." A tiny hint of a blush was visible on his cheeks.

Ino didn't know whether to be mortified or flattered. Regardless, she had to get back to her team now that Hidan had taken off. They'd need all the help they could get. And all she could do was pray that he wouldn't blab about the whole thing to all of them just to humiliate her.

She turned to Sai. "Never. Ever. Speak a word of what you saw to anyone. Ever."

He nodded, wide-eyed.

_Well, at least he showed up before I actually did it with Hidan. Wait, why the hell do I feel disappointed?!_

End.

Notes: THIS IS NOT TO BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY. I like Hidan/Ino and wrote this because right now it's the only possible idea I can come up with for them to almost do it. I'll write something better when I come up with something serious. And since the theory that Hidan does not have sex because of his religion makes me cry, I have my own theory that he only does it with virgins, since they are pure (until he gets ahold of them at least). And besides, his religion encourages torture, murder, and allows for an extremely bad potty mouth. I don't see why sex should be excluded.


End file.
